Last night at our dance a young lady asked me how to buckle ballroom shoes. “I Googled it,” said the young lady, “and I couldn’t find anything!” She had a pair of shoes that had been sitting in her closet for at least a year, unworn, because she wasn’t sure how to operate the buckle. A lot of ballroom shoes come with this nifty (but not self-evident) quick-release buckle mechanism. If you know how to use it, you will become resentful of ballroom shoes with regular buckles. If you don’t know how to use it, your shoes will languish in neglect and you will be sad. To address these problems (baffling buckles and their apparent absence from The Google), I have made my first-ever instructional video, How to Buckle Ballroom Shoes. Its subtitle is “How to Look Washed-Out in a Webcam Video.” Enjoy! And please send blush & eyeliner.